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I was with the British Army, very fit and aggressive a typical result of soldiering since the age of 17. For example I had passed a commando course with the French and came out ‘best recruit’. Strange things were beginning to happen to my body and with the various symptoms I knew that something was badly wrong with my central nervous system. There being a thousand and one things that can go wrong on that side I came to the conclusion that MS was probably the favourite due to the amount of symptoms. I had felt these for a number of years and they had just increased in severity. I went to the Medical Officer whose answer was extra physical training (ignorant man). When I pointed out my thoughts on what was wrong he scoffed and said well go to civvies-street and they will sort you out there. So I did, the army is no place to be unwell. For the first couple of months my symptoms eased, probably because I was no longer running around pushing my body to the limit. However the symptoms came back with a vengeance. I ‘fell off the edge’. This all happened in 1988. My GP was brilliant. We discussed my thoughts and he agreed that I was probably correct in my diagnosis and referred me to a neurologist. She ‘slapped and tickled’ me left then returned after half an hour stating “There is nothing wrong with you” and walked off. This coincided with a burst of double vision so obviously she was telling me ‘porky pies’. Incidentally a GP showed me the notes that woman had made; ‘reassured patient’ was quite prominent at the end of the entry. I will never forgive her for her arrogance on that visit. The following year I was in and out of a wheelchair, blind, deaf, and the usual sensation and toilet problems. Nothing lasted very long and I consumed all the medication prescribed for me. The notes my GP openly showed me stated that with all probability I had MS. Yet it took a year for the neurologist to say to my face. My wife and I both laughed with relief, as I had been slowly coming to the conclusion that I was going mad and that the notes I saw were just there to appease my worries. The neurologist, who could not look at me as she informed us, looked stunned as we laughed. The relief was enormous - we had come to terms with MS the year before. So in all I cannot forgive some doctors and not praise others enough. I have a GP now with whom I have a good relationship with and a neurologist who treats me as a man of equal standing (confuses me as well). In those early days I was in and out of hospital on a regular basis and I was often asked to go and talk to other patients. So maybe my attitude was recognised and being a determined little sod with a stupid sense of humour I did a little good. The army taught me why cry when you can laugh. My wife was in a maternity unit giving birth to our first born while I was in another hospital annoying the staff. Not having money for a taxi I sneaked out and walked to the maternity unit. They would not let me in! It was the middle of the night and I was swaying a bit with slurred speech so they thought I was drunk. I showed them the hospital band around my wrist so they phoned my hospital for confirmation. Boy was I given a reprimand from all quarters. Still I was there for that most amazing sight the birth of a new life. Here was reason to fight the MS and a focal point to this day when I get down. I think of my daughters and that kicks me into action again. On the good side of having MS (maybe thinking I was mad was not too far out) for me is that I was a career soldier and so would have seen action in two Gulf wars and whatever else the British Army has been up to since the eighties. I might not have lived; I might have ended the lives of other people! So I am relieved that I never had to fire a shot in anger. I was at the birth of both daughters; I was there for their first smile, first word, and first crawl. I remember being at play group discussing the pro’s and con’s of various nappies thinking how life has changed; a year ago I was being super macho running around frightening people. MS has given me a wonderful love of life. I find the smallest things give me great pleasure. I am more tolerant of others and I hope a nicer person because of it.  I have been fortunate in that I have a gift for art. I sold my first work when I was 14 and sold regularly ever since. Even when my vision went I still had to create so I turned to sculpture, which has stayed with me ever since. I have a website www.netzfineart.com which shows a selection of my work. I am sure that it has helped my motor control by forcing me to work through my problems. If you don’t use it you lose it! I have big problems with fatigue so I manage just a couple of hours a day. I am married to my second wife - the strain of MS did not help in the first marriage - and have inherited another family who all accept me walking in, sitting down and falling asleep mid conversation (they say it is the only time I shut up). They have made me a grandfather before my time. My daughters are turning into young women of great strength and personality so life is treating me well. We all have bad times, but we also have good times; that is life. Best wishes to all, Edward |
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